Since April is almost over, I guess it's time for an update

Today is April 23 and it's currently 97 degrees outside. Most people complain over and over about the heat, but not me. I love it. It makes me happy and I am a better person when it's warm! I swam for the first time this weekend, a little earlier than I usually take the dive, but it felt so good after laying out in the sun for 15 minutes.

April has flown by just as fast as the rest of the year has and I can hardly believe that Travis will be 11 months old this coming Friday. That means, only one month left until his 1st birthday. Wait, what? Did I say 1st birthday? Yes, time is flying.

I've continued with my hot yoga practices this month at least once a week, sometimes twice. I really enjoy it and how it makes me feel both during and after. I've still been running and even completed another 5k. It was called the "Firefly Run" and it was a night time race through the streets of downtown Phoenix. I was joined by a few girlfriends and we had a blast, ,or at least I did anyways. I ran my fastest 3.1 miles I've ever run and was so proud of the accomplishment. Now I'm resting up for the Warrior Dash coming up this Saturday. Myself and four girlfriends will be dressed in our hot pink tutus and pretty in mud tanks as we move through the obstacle course.

My spring classes are coming to a close with my last final due this weekend. I am so ready for the three month break before I start my Anatomy & Physiology class in August. I don't have a whole lot planned for the summer other than swim, swim and swim some more.

Joey is doing great in school, keeping on top of his grades and we aren't having any trouble with him and teachers. It's such a good feeling to know we are raising such a well behaved boy! I just don't know how to swallow the fact that he will be 13 in just a few short months. A teenager? Oh my...

Travis is all over the place. Can't keep that boy still. He loves to explore and show off his early adapted walking skills. It's hard sometimes because I feel like he is much older than he really is. I have to remind myself constantly that he is still a baby. His tummy issues are getting better, he's fully on Similac Alimentum formula and seems to be handling it very well. He's still having some issues with the solid foods, but I think in time he will outgrow the allergies and his pickiness. I think it's kind of going hand in hand.

Homework break is over, time to get back to work before Travis wakes up from his nap. Can't say that I'll write again soon, because I really don't know...

Wrap yourself around me

I haven't been in much of a writing in my blog type of mood as of late...

The last two months have been somewhat of (yes another) blur. Days, nights, weeks, they all blend together with the same goal in mind. Feed Travis. Feed myself. Get Travis to sleep, shower, sleep, you get the point.

A couple weeks ago we hired a Newborn Care Specialist, after getting to the end of our rope, tired, annoyed, frustrated and plain mad. She came to our house, spoke with us about what we had been doing with Travis and how it was done all wrong, but we did it because it was really the only thing we could do to keep ourselves sane. She educated us on the importance of teaching good sleep skills early on and that if we teach him now, he'll forever keep the skill.

Things around the house are much better after working with her... no more middle of the night feedings and Travis is now napping in spurts longer than 30 minutes. Who would have though you could actually train your baby to sleep? The key? More sleep = More sleep. I've also started him on solids as of yesterday. So far, so good and no reaction other than a little bit more gas in the evening. Hopefully his little tummy can handle it and it doesn't create too much of a problem.

It's now December and almost time for Christmas. I haven't shopped one bit and frankly don't even want to. Joey is going to spend the holidays with his dad in Tennessee and it will be just Paul, Travis and I here in Arizona. Yes, of course, I am happy that it's Travis' first Christmas and all but really, it's about the photos. He's not going to remember it. He won't remember the presents he's given and he probably won't even care to open them. (he was given a present at Thanksgiving and he cried the whole time he was crinkling the paper. The sound maybe?) Call me Scrooge if you want, I'm just not in the mood. Maybe once we put up our tree this weekend, I'll change my mind. Maybe.

I'm ready for the new year. Again. I have personal goals for the year and I'm really excited to embark on a new journey.

8 Weeks.

Travis is 8 weeks old today.

The last 8 weeks haven't gotten any easier, in fact, they have gotten harder. After cutting everything out of my diet, also called a "Total Elimination Diet" there was still no change in Travis and he actually had blood in his stool. His pediatrician diagnosed him with Allergic Colitis and suggested we switch him to formula. This decision was both very difficult for me and easy at the same time. Easy only because I didn't want to see my child suffer anymore as something I was eating was tearing up his insides. It was difficult because breastfeeding is something that is so important to me and I really wanted to be able to provide for him as I did for Joey.

After 5 days on Similac Alimentum formula he had an amazing day! Two of them in fact and his pediatrician did another stool test and it was already negative for blood. We actually thought things were looking up and the road we were on had come to an end. We were wrong. Late that evening he started with his screaming again.

Let me just explain something. I understand babies cry. I understand there is a thing called "Colic" (ie: we don't know). What Travis has is not normal baby fussiness. It's painful cries for hours and hours all throughout the day and nothing consoles him. He wakes up screaming in pain, falls asleep after tiring himself out from screaming in pain. It's not normal and we have had his pediatrician and a GI specialist both tell us that, "This isn't normal. This is excessive and we need to fix this so that it doesn't cause later problems."

Another 6 days of crying and I called his doctor, again. I think I've talked to her at least once a week for the last 8 weeks, I'm sure she's tired of hearing from us. She advised that at this point, we need to seek help with a Pediatric GI Specialist. On Tuesday, July 19 I took him to see this specialist and she had yet more "trial and error" ideas she wanted to practice on our son. She said that she *thinks* he has several severe food allergies and can't even be on the Alimentum formula. She switched him to a prescription formula that has completely broken down food proteins and should solve the problem. It's called Elecare and it's not exactly cheap. BUT we will pay whatever price we have to to fix our baby boy.

After just 2 bottles of Elecare Travis was worse. He was acting the same way he used to act when he was on breastmilk and it only got worse throughout the night. The next morning I called the Dr. again to see if this was normal... he was horrible. Screaming, tears and exhausting himself so much he wouldn't eat. When she called back, she said it was rare to have a reaction to that formula but to stop giving him that one and we'd switch to Neocate. Ugh. Switch again....

Right now we are going on day 4 of the amino-acid based prescription formula. There is a difference from when he was nursing, but there is no difference from when he was on the Alimentum formula. For both his pediatrician and the GI specialist, they said if there is no change with the formula then we are going to start running tests on him to see what it is. They've already ordered an ultrasound of his brain, (yes, this freaks me out) and they are going to do blood work and test his urine.

This hasn't been a fun journey by any means. I can't remember the last time I actually felt, happy or relaxed for that matter. It's been one thing after another and I just wish we could reach a solution. I am so tired of trial and error and I'm breaking down. I'm exhausted, only getting about 3-4 hours of sleep a night and barely any naps during the day since Travis will only sleep 20-30 minutes at a time. Of course, during that time I have to eat, shower or wash bottles <---not my favorite chore.

I'm not giving up, but I sure do feel like it times. I cry daily and my body is starting to physically hurt. I am so thankful that I have such a loving supportive husband who will listen to me when I'm a blubbering mess and an 11 year old son who is so understanding to the situation. He's even worried about Travis. We all are.

He finally just fell asleep so I am off to join him...