8 Weeks.

Travis is 8 weeks old today.

The last 8 weeks haven't gotten any easier, in fact, they have gotten harder. After cutting everything out of my diet, also called a "Total Elimination Diet" there was still no change in Travis and he actually had blood in his stool. His pediatrician diagnosed him with Allergic Colitis and suggested we switch him to formula. This decision was both very difficult for me and easy at the same time. Easy only because I didn't want to see my child suffer anymore as something I was eating was tearing up his insides. It was difficult because breastfeeding is something that is so important to me and I really wanted to be able to provide for him as I did for Joey.

After 5 days on Similac Alimentum formula he had an amazing day! Two of them in fact and his pediatrician did another stool test and it was already negative for blood. We actually thought things were looking up and the road we were on had come to an end. We were wrong. Late that evening he started with his screaming again.

Let me just explain something. I understand babies cry. I understand there is a thing called "Colic" (ie: we don't know). What Travis has is not normal baby fussiness. It's painful cries for hours and hours all throughout the day and nothing consoles him. He wakes up screaming in pain, falls asleep after tiring himself out from screaming in pain. It's not normal and we have had his pediatrician and a GI specialist both tell us that, "This isn't normal. This is excessive and we need to fix this so that it doesn't cause later problems."

Another 6 days of crying and I called his doctor, again. I think I've talked to her at least once a week for the last 8 weeks, I'm sure she's tired of hearing from us. She advised that at this point, we need to seek help with a Pediatric GI Specialist. On Tuesday, July 19 I took him to see this specialist and she had yet more "trial and error" ideas she wanted to practice on our son. She said that she *thinks* he has several severe food allergies and can't even be on the Alimentum formula. She switched him to a prescription formula that has completely broken down food proteins and should solve the problem. It's called Elecare and it's not exactly cheap. BUT we will pay whatever price we have to to fix our baby boy.

After just 2 bottles of Elecare Travis was worse. He was acting the same way he used to act when he was on breastmilk and it only got worse throughout the night. The next morning I called the Dr. again to see if this was normal... he was horrible. Screaming, tears and exhausting himself so much he wouldn't eat. When she called back, she said it was rare to have a reaction to that formula but to stop giving him that one and we'd switch to Neocate. Ugh. Switch again....

Right now we are going on day 4 of the amino-acid based prescription formula. There is a difference from when he was nursing, but there is no difference from when he was on the Alimentum formula. For both his pediatrician and the GI specialist, they said if there is no change with the formula then we are going to start running tests on him to see what it is. They've already ordered an ultrasound of his brain, (yes, this freaks me out) and they are going to do blood work and test his urine.

This hasn't been a fun journey by any means. I can't remember the last time I actually felt, happy or relaxed for that matter. It's been one thing after another and I just wish we could reach a solution. I am so tired of trial and error and I'm breaking down. I'm exhausted, only getting about 3-4 hours of sleep a night and barely any naps during the day since Travis will only sleep 20-30 minutes at a time. Of course, during that time I have to eat, shower or wash bottles <---not my favorite chore.

I'm not giving up, but I sure do feel like it times. I cry daily and my body is starting to physically hurt. I am so thankful that I have such a loving supportive husband who will listen to me when I'm a blubbering mess and an 11 year old son who is so understanding to the situation. He's even worried about Travis. We all are.

He finally just fell asleep so I am off to join him...