Monday, January 31, 2011

Virtual? Yes, please!

Another weekend came and went, faster than usual and packed with busy-ness. Movies, steak and potatoes, yummy desserts, football, supercross and my new recliner. All things that make a pregnant momma say, "ahhhh".

Saw "No Strings Attached" this weekend, starring Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman. Boy, do I ever still have a crush on Ashton. Not sure what it is, but that guy is such a cutie! Tall and handsome and played such a sweetheart in the movie. It was awfully predictable but really, what movie isn't? Definitely not a kids movie, with the crude humor and lines that made me laugh until my belly hurt. Paul was not too thrilled to see the movie, as he says I tricked him. (he thought we were seeing "Hall Pass" but that isn't out yet, hehehe).

Paul and Joey went riding yesterday and for the first time I felt, well, really pregnant. Riding is one of my favorite hobbies and weekend activities to do and it was so hard for me to watch them drive away, without me. I could have gone, but they were going to check out a new place in the desert that we weren't sure had bathrooms. It's a good thing I didn't go because I would have been squatting next to a cactus. I really don't mind squatting in the desert but pregnant and squatting isn't something I want to experience unless I absolutely have to.

They had such a great time and came home with stories, laughs and of course a closer bond. Every day that has gone by over the past five years has brought them closer to one another and I love seeing it. Paul truly is an awesome father to Joey and Joey sees it and appreciates it. Makes my heart melt, knowing I found "the one".

Since I won't be traveling home next month for a baby shower, my mom and her sister decided to have a virtual baby shower for me.  I am so excited that they all still want to get together and have a shower, honoring little baby Gerbi even though I won't be there, in person. I'll get to experience the whole thing via Skype and my mom is going to act as me and open my presents. I can't wait!!! It really shows me how much my family loves me and makes me smile. I am truly blessed and so thankful.




Tuesday, January 25, 2011


I knew from the beginning that I was going to sign up for some sort of birth class with my husband, just wasn't sure what it was going to be. When I was pregnant with my son Joey, I went through a Lamaze class at the military hospital on Oahu and it was great. Most of the sessions my friend Lisa accompanied me (since my ex-husband was gone a lot) and they were very informative. I pretty much remember all of the Lamaze techniques and how to breathe, so I wanted something different this time around.

I had read a little bit about Hypnobirthing in one of the many pregnancy handouts I got from my Dr.'s office and it sparked a little interest. It takes a whole different approach to natural birthing, using a relaxation technique and adopting the philosophy that pain doesn't have to accompany labor. You can read more about it here.


Once I found out that I may have to have a cesarean section in order to "deliver" my baby instead of giving birth to him, a lot of my excitement for classes such as these went out the window. I stopped looking in to them in fear of getting my hopes up for a natural vaginal delivery.

Today, my friend Kori called me and asked me if I'd be interested in taking a hypnobirthing class with her, and her husband. I was instantly excited and felt that with my positive thinking, maybe, just maybe I could still have the natural birth that I want. When I went on to the hypnobirthing website, I found several bits of information that it can also be beneficial to mothers who have to have a necessary cesarean section! Where do I sign up?

I'm excited to start this class, it's going to be once a week for 9 weeks. Crazy, thinking that I am due in just 17 short weeks, the timing will be perfect. It will also be a great experience to go through this class with another couple that we are friends with! (She is due just 4 weeks after me).

"When you change the way you view birth,

the way you birth will change."

-Marie F. Mongan

Friday, January 21, 2011

Thoughts and fears

I'm having a hard time accepting the fact that my only choice for delivery may be a c-section. The number one thing that matters is that I have a healthy baby boy in my arms, but how he gets here has always been something I took for granted.

I gave birth to Joey completely natural, almost 12 years ago. Even when I was 19, I felt strongly about natural, drug free births and the thought never crossed my mind that I would have to have a c-section. Now, going into this pregnancy the thought never crossed my mind either. From the moment that we started talking about trying to get pregnant, I had talked with my husband about my birthing beliefs. It's so hard for me to accept the possibility and I'm just not sure how to "get over it" and just accept reality. Millions of women go through the surgery method of birth and they recover just fine, as do their babies. I just never thought I might be one of those women.

I'm not going to lie. I'm scared and terrified. I don't want an epidural. It terrifies me to think of someone putting a needle in my already screwed up spine. I don't want to have dr's cut open my abdomen to remove the baby, I want him to come when he's ready and the natural way, so I can hold him and nurse him as soon as possible. I understand that if my condition doesn't get better, it's very dangerous to both me and baby if I was to try a vaginal delivery but I'm just praying that my condition gets better and I don't even have to worry about all of this crap! February 7 can't get here soon enough.

I've gained 12 pounds since the day I tested positive. I'm 21 weeks, 5 days and to me that seems like a lot of weight. I know that it's normal, and I'm going to gain weight but I'm sorry, no matter who you are, weight is weight and it's hard to swallow. I love seeing my growing belly, I just don't love seeing my growing butt. In the mirror it looks the same, but I can tell the difference when I try on certain clothes that fit me just two weeks ago... they are a little tight in the bottom area. My weight gain goal is 25 maybe 30 pounds. I'm hoping that I can stay on track and stay within those numbers especially if I do end up having to have a c-section, since I can't start exercising as soon after delivery.

I think the one thing I love more than anything is not just feeling little Honda move around but having Joey sit with his hand on my belly feeling his brothers little kicks and squirms. It truly is a happy mommy moment and I will never forget it. It's something that you can't ever get back so I'm enjoying every second of it. I'm not trying to hide my belly either, now that it actually looks like a pregnant belly and not just a beer belly and I really can't imagine what it's going to look like in another 12 weeks or even 15 weeks. It already seem so huge to me!!

Babies are a blessing and I am so thankful I am getting to experience all that motherhood brings. I may whine and complain but who doesn't? Deep down, I am thankful, compassionate and so happy to have another baby boy to call my own!

Wednesday, January 19, 2011


It's starting to feel more real now. This whole baby thing. I registered yesterday at Babies R Us and figured out pretty much everything I need and want for this little guy. It's more or less a list of things I'll need to buy before he arrives.

Little Honda has been kicking so much over the past day or so. I think it's just that he's getting bigger so I am feeling it more often, and it's the best feeling in the world! I love the little taps and jabs. I slept a little better last night, which was needed after the lack of sleep I got Monday night. My nausea was back and I actually got sick, which hasn't happened in a few months. It seemed more like it was brought on by my acid reflux, and it's wasn't pleasant.

I've officially dropped my spring semester classes. I just couldn't get the right mindset and I don't want to be stressing about that. I'd like to focus on family and the baby and getting ready for his arrival. The heaviest workload was going to be April-May and with my due date being May 29, with the possibility of a C-Section in the first week of May, I didn't want to chance it. I'll pick up a class in the Summer II session and if not there, definitely in the fall.

I shouldn't be doing this, but I'm going to finish watching this week's Bachelor episode, I know... I know...

Monday, January 17, 2011

Little Honda

What a fantastic weekend! Our friends from Yuma were in town visiting along with their parents from Kansas City. We had a houseful on Friday night, but it was so enjoyable!! I got to spend so much time holding our friend's 3 week old baby girl Makenna. She is a doll... I can't wait until our little guy is born. Taylor, our friend's 3-year-old, said that we should name our baby "Kawasaki" (like the motorcycle) then switched it up to "Honda" because we ride Honda's. So... little guy has adopted the nickname of Honda until we decide which name best suits him.

Joey had another football game on Saturday. The weather was great, and showed me that I need to invest in a pair of maternity shorts. I was wearing blue jeans and a tank top but was a little warm in the 78 degree sun. Paul's cousin Stacie was able to come to the game too, that really made Joey happy! They ended up winning the game 18-12 so it puts their team 2-0 so far for this season. Go Hawks!

Supercross was on Saturday night and of course we went to that. We never miss it. We had pretty good seats and it's always awesome to watch the races live (since we watch all of the other ones from our couch). I was a little disappointed with the outcome of the main event but that's only because my boy Ryan Dungey didn't win. There wasn't a lot of competition and they all just kind of kept to themselves out there. Don't get me wrong, the race was still great!

We made our first "baby" purchase yesterday afternoon. We started out at BabiesRus to look at cribs and rocking chairs. We have a better idea of what we want to get as far as a crib now, and the rocking chairs they had were terrible. We went to LazyBoy to see what kind of recliner/rockers they had and BAM! We found the perfect chair. I can't wait to pick it up on Wednesday and starting rocking this little guy... I want him to be used to the rocking when he's born.

Joey doesn't have school today so it's kind of a lazy housecleaning type of day. I don't think we'll be going anywhere, except for maybe a walk to the park. We might even get a head start on packing up some of his room getting ready to move rooms around in preparation for the baby.

I've been feeling pretty good the past few days, in the evening my back and belly start to ache. It's almost as if I can feel my stomach stretching. I guess that's a good thing, means little Honda is growing!!! Today I am 21 weeks 1 day, only 18 weeks to go!

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Curve ball

It is so hard to believe that I am already half way there. It seems like yesterday I was laying in bed praying for the nausea to go away. Now it only visits me in spurts. The heart burn is what has started lately....

We took Joe to the ultrasound appt again with us on Monday, he thinks it's pretty cool to see his baby brother on the monitor. We feel it's very important to keep him involved in our growing family since he's so used to be an only child.  He's so excited to have a little brother and knows how important his role is in the family. Baby boy will definitely be looking up to Joe as his idol!

At my appointment on Monday my midwife told us that I have Partial Placenta Previa. I was quite upset about it when she told us that most likely the only form of delivery I could endure would be via C-Section. I am a completely natural, Bradley Method sort of person and this news was very hard for me to hear. However, I do know that what's most important is that baby gets here safely and healthy.

She advised me to take it easy for the next 4 weeks and I am to have another ultrasound on Feb 7 to see if my previa has improved or if it has gotten worse. I am praying that it gets better and I will still be able to have a natural vaginal birth. I am still walking every day, but she told me to not do any strenuous activites and to avoid intercourse (poor Paul).

It's definitely a curve ball I wasn't ready to be up at bat for. Paul keeps reminding me that, "Everything happens for a reason" and I'm still trying to figure out the reasoning behind all of this. I've had a natural birth in the past, I've read the books again and have prepared myself but now I may have to have a "Delivery Day" instead of birth day? I'm hoping that I can get more used to that.

As I type, baby boy is kicking me and causing me some serious acid reflux. Only a preview of what's to come in the next 20 weeks...

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

New Year. New Blessings. New Challenges.

It's a new year with new challenges, changes and blessings. I haven't written in a while because I have been busy with school and traveling the past couple of months.

Where to begin...

I'm pregnant. 20 weeks 3 days to be precise. We just found out on Monday that we will be welcoming a little boy into our family and we are all so extremely excited! Joey has been working hard on lists of names that we all like and we are hoping by the time the little human makes his entrance, we'll have a name chosen.

The first 12 weeks were very difficult, I was sick all of the time, both with nausea and colds. No matter how healthy I ate and kept up my exercise regimen I couldn't help but picking up colds from the supermarket and wherever else we went on the weekends. Thankfully, all that has passed and I have been feeling great. I've gained a total of 10lbs since date of conception, which to me, isn't that bad considering I'm halfway there.

Joe started playing football in October and has been enjoying it immensely. He practices two nights a week for 2 hours each night and has a game every Saturday. He asked us if he could continue playing through the winter months, so we've got 8 more games to go. He's really becoming a nice young man and getting stronger and stronger with each game. Last weekend he even recovered a fumble!

When I was 7 weeks pregnant, Paul found out that he would be getting laid off at work. It was mid-October and he was told his last day would be December 1. A little bit scary and not at all what we had envisioned. Luckily after a lot of hard work and searching, many interviews, he found an even better job than he had before. He started there last week and has loved every day so far. It's a great company and they seem to really take care of their employees.

Paul was off work for a month and a half, which allowed us to travel to California to see our families at both Thanksgiving and Christmas. Both visits were very nice but we were happy to be home, in our own beds and with our own routine. We really do love Arizona and are so happy that we moved here. It's hard to believe we've been here for a little over 2 years already. Amazing how quickly time goes.

School has been going well for me, I'm only going to be taking one class this semester. The last English class that I will need for my general education requirements. I chose to only take one class because the semester ends May 13 and I am due May 29. Didn't want to give myself too much stress come April-May. 

It's nap time...